BlazeLime Strong and Moving!

Noutions Good movie, but best of all time? Hardly . . .

Brainsbell The story-telling is good with flashbacks.The film is both funny and heartbreaking. You smile in a scene and get a soulcrushing revelation in the next.

Fatma Suarez The movie's neither hopeful in contrived ways, nor hopeless in different contrived ways. Somehow it manages to be wonderful

slayrrr666 "Splatter Farm" is a mildly entertaining offer if it's interesting.**SPOILERS**Off on summer vacation, twins Alan, (Mark Polonia) and Joseph, (John Polonia) decide to take a trip out to see their Aunt Lacey, (Marion Costly) on her farm. While there, they meet up with her new farmhand assistant Jeremy, (Todd Rimatti) and they immediately begin to suspect something is wrong with him. As they spend more time on the ranch, his actions become even weirder and it worries them even more. While out in the nearby woods one day, they find that he's a psychotic killer responsible for killing and dismembering his victims in gruesome fashion. Realizing that it's not safe anywhere on the ranch, they try to get out before they become victims of his wrath as well.The Good News: Frankly, it isn't bad if you're interested in that sort of thing. The fact that it might not be realistic in any manner or form doesn't mean that it isn't gory. There's a decapitation, a scythe impaled in the back, a shotgun blast to the head, a complete and utter dismembering that results in the body being hacked up beyond recognition and the head slashed to a pulp with an ax, another being tortured with all sorts of different tools and equipment as well as being blown to pieces from a firecracker impaled into the body through a corncob holder. These don't bear any sort of realism, though, and are quite bad, but still the thought that it's quite bloody and gory isn't all that bad. The main torture sequence is actually rather decent, using a variety of different methods not previously seen, including being smeared with dirt, stripped naked and then urinated on, whipped and slapped as well being impaled with a pitchfork. The scene is long, intense and comes the closest the film gets towards real horror. Unfortunately, these are the only things that the film provides which are any good.The Bad News: Frankly, this one is really only faulty for a couple of reasons, and none are more so than it's screamingly low-budget. Almost everything in here is so obviously done on the cheap that it eventually gets tiresome. From the mannequins used to duplicate the bodies for the damage to the models of body parts used for the severed limbs as well as the painfully obvious non-body used for the opening disemboweling and dismembering, these are just way too fake to be taken seriously. Even the blood on display is too fake, going with the too lightly colored-and-watery appearance most of the time or using the old watered-down ketchup route to imitate blood, and both results are about as obvious as the dummy's head used for the decapitation scene. From the cheap-looking set, obviously done at a real live farm out in the woods since there's no way it can be that cheap without being realistic, to the fact that it's so closed-off and limiting, this one is easily cheap and discomforting. That is what causes this one to be lower than it should.The Final Verdict: So obviously low-budget at the expense of it's own sake, this one doesn't really do a whole lot. Only the most hardcore, low-budget, shot-on-video fans would get anything out of this one, while just about everyone else should ignore and avoid this one.Rated R: Graphic Violence, Graphic Language and Brief Nudity

indiefilmfool I just received the twentieth anniversary edition two disc set of Splatter Farm from www.regalstudios.com. Wow! This is one of the most entertaining DVD sets I've ever received and I've purchased a lot of indie films over the years.I won't go into all the details of the set but if your a Splatter Farm fan you have to get this. It's got a new version of the film with a new soundtrack plus a new documentary with the cast and it's even signed by Todd Michael Smith who played Jeremy! Whats more the two disc set is just as insane and fun as the movie itself.Splatter farm now and forever!!

EVOL666 I'll admit - in pretty much every conceivable way, SPLATER FARM pretty much sucks dick. The acting is horrible, the gore is very amateurish, the technical aspects of the film (camera-work, lighting, editing, etc...) are non-existent - but to me, this is one of those films where the whole is MUCH better than the sum of it's parts.The plot revolves around twin brothers (who look like half-retarded Ralph Macchio look-alikes) who are on their way to their aunt's house for vacation. She's an old-bag that has a thing for one of the twins, which is alluded to from the get-go. She has a boy that she keeps around to do the work on the farm, and who also brings people into the barn to hack up and masturbate with their body parts. The twins notice something amiss with the farm-worker (even without seeing him jacking-off with severed arms and whatnot...) and they begin to suspect that something is up...There's so much wrong with SPLATTER FARM that I don't even know where to begin. Where it makes up for it's insane ineptitude, is in the fact that it really is quite funny, and a bit more original and thought-out than what the $7 budget would dictate. The gore scenes, though cheap, are effective for the most part, and there are a few truly decent "gross-out" moments (anal-fisting, anyone?). The storyline even has an effective "twist" in the plot that actually works. The dialog is stupid but often hilarious and I just got caught up in the super-cheap vibe of the film. It actually reminded me a bit of Jorg Buttgereit's NEKROMANTIK (in terms of style, not content) but without any of J.B.'s artistry. A very strange little film - I'd suggest it to those that dig low-budget splatter. Lord knows I've seen worse by more (supposedly) "talented" directors. Just watch SPLATTER FARM and then anything by Andreas Schnaas back-to-back and I think you'll see what I mean...8.5/10

movesukkaz Do not believe the raving and ranting about this one, you will not find it shocking, or gross, or 'nauseating' as some other reviewers would have you believe. Once again we have a terminally boring and dumb oddity that no one has seen, and those that have feel privileged for some odd reason and thus, obligated to hype it up into something its not even close to being."F'ed up" and "sickenly far" are phrases some reviewer chose to use to describe Splatter Farm. Needless to say, that made me laugh almost as hard as the movie did! THERE IS NOTHING SICK OR SHOCKING IN THIS FILM. ITS ALL JUST WORDS. Sure there's some blood and gore, but when an entire movie comes of like a goof, how on earth can it be shocking? For example, the animal cruelty scene (token for any exploiter) shows man lifting hammer, cut to closeup of horse, cut to hammer being lifted, cut to closeup of horse, cut to horse naying and running away...yes folks, ready those pacemakers and prepare for the shock!Or howabout the incest scene with the aunt and the nephew, here's how it goes.Aunt: I'm feeling lonely, I drugged your drink. Cut to someone sitting on bed with a big sheet over them, bouncing up and down for 3 seconds (that is supposed to be the aunt and nephew doing it under the covers). End scene. And yes, thats as disturbing as this stinker gets. Every "shock" in this flick is poorly executed and lifted from either Nekromantik or Island of Death (others I'm sure) and just comes of as ineffective and funny(!), the type of reaction you shouldn't have.The only thing more perplexing than the oh so "sick and twisted...I love it" kids praising moronic movies like this are the detractors condemning them for being so filthy and disgusting (eg. Cannibal Holocaust), anyone that enjoys it must need help. I mean I just don't get it. Like most exploiters, nothing comes off as genuine and is usually badly handled so why bother making a fuss? Anyway, if you're looking for shocks or hell, even just a fun time, don't be mislead. This one doesn't deliver the goods at all, fan of exploitation cinema or not.