Lovesusti The Worst Film Ever

Cathardincu Surprisingly incoherent and boring

FuzzyTagz If the ambition is to provide two hours of instantly forgettable, popcorn-munching escapism, it succeeds.

Calum Hutton It's a good bad... and worth a popcorn matinée. While it's easy to lament what could have been...

Leofwine_draca ZOMBIE ISLAND MASSACRE is an extremely cheap and trashy horror film that was put out by the team at Troma. The story involves a bunch of characters who end up stranded on an island populated by zombies and murderers, and in the best slasher tradition they end up getting bumped off one at a time. Sadly, the cheap gore effects are ridiculous and laughable rather than effective, so the emphasis is very much on the displaying of female skin more than anything else. This film feels oddly reminiscent of the likes of ZOMBIE FLESH EATERS and ZOMBIE HOLOCAUST in terms of execution, but it's not a patch on those infamous Italian gut-munchers.

MartinHafer The word "zombie" was added to the title to titillate--as was the presence of Rita Jenrette--as nymphet whose 15 minutes of fame came when talked publicly about her and her congressman husband's supposed tryst on the steps of the Capitol building. Normally, the adventures of a horny lady such as Jenrette would have quickly fizzled in the public's mind had she not subsequently posed for Playboy and starred in this cheap exploitation picture.Those looking for zombies will no doubt be disappointed, though if you are looking for horny tourists who take off their clothes with little provocation (especially Ms. Jenrette) you will no doubt be satisfied. Heck, the film should have been more appropriately titled "Horny Island Massacre" as indeed there is lots of gratuitous killing and there's something about that tropical air that turns people into horn-dogs! Of course, given the title, the fact it was made by Troma Films AND the sleazy advertising campaign that accompanied the movie's debut, none of this should come as much of a surprise. It's NOT to be mistaken for Shakespeare and you can hardly expect more than you get.The film has no stars (other than perhaps Jenrette--the Paris Hilton of her day) and has a rather low budget. The writing is pretty dim and there are only a few surprises along the way. One of the particularly silly bits is when the remaining five people wander into a mansion at night. It's totally dark outside, yet one of them almost instantly finds a small handgun hidden in the bushes!! He couldn't have found it faster if he'd had a map! There are also some really dumb people who act almost like they WANT to be killed they behaved so stupidly! I also loved the way Jenrette emoted when her movie husband was killed--it was so embarrassingly bad it gave me a chuckle.Overall, the film is worth seeing only for the first two minutes, as you get to see an awful lot of the lovely Mrs. Jenrette--an AWFUL lot! After that, it's all down hill! A film worth watching only for bad film fan and the curious who want to catch a glimpse of Jenrette naked. All others beware!

Candice Boyle (SalamanderGirl) Aside from a really stupid scene where black magic resurrects an island villager, there are NO ZOMBIES in this stupid movie! The "plot" is a rehash from a million other grade-Z thrillers, with bad actors walking around spouting nonsense dialogue, while a very bored audience waits for them to die. Correction: while a very bored audience waits for them to get EATEN BY ZOMBIES, which THEY DON'T! This isn't even a crappy "Dawn of the Dead" rip-off, it's nothing. A more appropriate title might have been "Boring People Massacre," or perhaps "Boring People on Island Where Nothing Happens".This reminds me of two other really bad "zombie" movies where there were no zombies. "Revenge of the Living Dead," and "Virgin among the Living Dead," neither of which had any zombies whatsoever. When the title and poster art and description on the video box promise ZOMBIES, they should maybe HAVE ZOMBIES in the movie! In any case, don't make the mistake I did. When and if you find this on your video shelf, DO NOT RENT IT!

Flixer1957 **Possible Spolers Ahead**This ranks with REVENGE OF THE DEAD as one of the poorest "zombie" flicks ever made. It has one of the worst "plot twists" since SHRIEK OF THE MUTILATED; this, and the movie overall, will make you feel cheated. There are only two reasons to watch this grade-z turkey, and both of them are hanging off of Rita Jenrette's chest. So there!