AniInterview Sorry, this movie sucks

Actuakers One of my all time favorites.

SnoReptilePlenty Memorable, crazy movie

Anoushka Slater While it doesn't offer any answers, it both thrills and makes you think.

SnoopyStyle Two law officers stumble onto a drug operation on an isolated Hawaiian island and are killed. Donna and Taryn are working for The Agency. They fly their small plane with honeymooners and a stowaway toxic snake infected with cancer infested rats. They leave the honeymooners on the deserted beach. Drug lord Seth Romero is transporting diamonds in his remote control helicopter but the girls intercept them while fighting off gun toting henchmen. The girls get help from Rowdy Abilene and Jade from the Agency as they battle Seth's goons at Edy's resort.There is no denying that this is intended to be a B-movie of guns and boobs. It has some limited charms if not taken seriously. The production is amateurish. The boobs from these Playboy models are big. The shootouts are done poorly and laughably. It's unintended comedy. The acting is slightly better than porn level. The lines are really cheesy to the point of being funny bad. I think somebody can come up with a great drinking game with this movie.

Scott LeBrun There's a place in the world for just about every kind of film. You have your Oscar baiting serious fare on one end, and then you have stuff like the Andy Sidaris oeuvre. The man played his own particular formula for everything that it was worth: combine gorgeous Playboy Playmates with James Bond type action scenarios and breathtaking scenery. The Hawaii setting is a wonderful backdrop indeed for these cheerfully sleazy and silly shenanigans. The story (if anybody does care) involves two extremely comely female special agents, Donna (Dona Speir) and Taryn (Hope Marie Carlton), who intercept a shipment of diamonds intended for a crime lord, Seth (Rodrigo Obregon). Oh, did I mention the cross dressing spy, or the hilariously phony looking deadly snake? They get worked into this mix, creating results that if not really inspired do make for generally agreeable entertainment. There's a knowingly cheesy approach to the whole thing, and Sidaris takes the time to promote himself as his work is advertised with use of posters from his previous films; he also does a cameo as a TV director. The film has genuinely amusing and entertaining characters, from smooth agent Rowdy Abilene (Ronn Moss), cousin of the Cody Abilene character from "Malibu Express", to his goofy pal Jade (Harold Diamond) to nefarious criminal kingpin Mr. Chang (Peter Bromilow). Of course, this is basically a vehicle for the charms of Ms. Speir and Ms. Carlton, and even if they're not overwhelmingly blessed in the acting department, that hardly matters. The voyeur in many of us will appreciate Sidaris taking each and every opportunity to have our sexy female cast members bare their breasts. There's also a fair bit of stuff blowing up real good to help keep this from ever getting dull. Overall, this is a good 'n' bouncy diversion worth a look for lovers of trashy B cinema. Seven out of 10.

BA_Harrison I suspect that the bulk of my review for any Andy Sidaris movie will sound something like this: big boobs... blah blah blah.... guns... blah blah blah.... great ass... shower scene... blah blah blah.... jacuzzi... blah blah blah (which will save me a fair amount of time at the keyboard, I suppose). While this all sounds well and good, I'm only two movies into my 12-film Girls, Guns and G-Strings box set, and I'm already finding Sidaris's initially promising formula of big breasted babes, bullets and bad guys extremely hard work thanks to the the uninspired scripts and pedestrian direction.Hard Ticket To Hawaii actually proves even more tedious than its predecessor Malibu Express, with a weaker plot (hard to imagine such a thing is possible, but here it is) and less sex (although, admittedly, still plenty of nudity from a bevy of hard-bodied babes); even the film's sillier scenes—a skateboarding assassin and his blow up sex-doll being shot out of the sky by a bazooka, a bad guy killed by a razor-edged frisbee, and a snake infected with toxins from cancer infested rats bursting out from a toilet bowl—are so poorly realised that they fail to make this anything but a massive B-movie bore, albeit one with great tits and ass.3.5 out of 10, rounded up to 4 for IMDb.

LeathermanCraig This is the cheesiest file to ever grace the air waves! Cheese, cheese and MORE cheese! The ONLY reason this movie got made (and the others that followed!) is thanks to Ms. Spier's considerable weapons.... Other than that, there is not much reason to watch this movie (or its followers) unless it's to see Miss August, 1987 bounce about in her bikini and 6 inch pumps.....Basic plot is just that - basic. Evil bad guy wants to take over the Hawaiian markets with drugs and diamonds. Add a killer snake to the mix (which was REALLY badly created!) and you've got a killer movie. NOT!First off, lots of lame lines, lame action and lame 'near soft core' porn. The special effects (what there are of 'em) are cheesey and... Uh... LAME! The locations are - well, hey! It IS Hawaii, so its not lame. Hell, even the 'drag queen' double agent was lame! Now, honestly, how many of you watched this thing and DIDN'T know that Michelle was actually a MICHAEL? Again, LAME! So lame!What had to be the most laughable aspect of the film, was the totally contrived scene with Donna and Rowdy - their 'sex' scene.... He looks like he's straight outta bad porn - especially with his fake moans and climax - and her acting wasn't much better. And, of course, isn't it always completely possible for two people to have sex when they're still wearing their underwear?!? Before, during and after, Donna and Rowdy are clothed.... Again, LAME!!!OK. I think you may have gotten my point on this one - and the others made after it. But if you haven't, let me sum it up in one sentence: LAME, LAME, LAME, LAME, LAME, LAME, LAME, LAME AND LAME!