willman85
I have absolutely no idea where to begin with reviewing this movie. Not because it's so terrible than I am floundered; rather, there are multiple layers and things worth talking about. For a start, Kevin Smith has a significant cameo in this. He really proves his ability to act pretty well. Perhaps he should stop making bad movies and get into acting! Bottoms Up will never achieve the acclaim of even the worst of Kevin Smith's movies - and that is absurd to me. The worst of Kevin Smith's movies are utterly dreadful. It is absurd that he is still riding on the success of his early couple of smashes. Even though this was a low-key movie, it seems nonsensical to me that he would risk his career and inflated acclaim on a flop. Evidently he is impervious to critical flops.Jason Mewes' performance is a little weak and he is unable to cease his stoner drawl. But his character I don't think is explicitly "a stoner" per se (I think he takes one bong hit in the movie and puffs on a blunt). If he was meant to be then it doesn't add anything to the story. He comes from a friendship group of wasters - including Kevin Smith's character - but he is a bartender with talent and ambition. He is therefore the hero who seeks his fortune in LA and eventually succeeds in his goal.Like the later Paris Hilton vehicle, The Hottie and the Nottie, this was grossly poorly received. I think that both are essentially okay. That's right, Bottoms Up is pretty alright - especially for a straight-to-DVD movie. Certainly not terrible. Paris' delivery and acting is underdeveloped here, but it is just as "fun" a movie, if not more so. It's certainly the more glamorous, if you're into the allure of wild LA parties, high society and Hollywood hotties.Paris Hilton's acting may have been better in The Hottie and the Nottie, but that also had a more predictable and formulaic story. I think on balance they're both more-or-less as good as each other. Though Bottoms Up is more fun, interesting and amusing I think.
Tommy Nelson
This movie feels like it's about 2 and a half hours. In actuality it runs at just over 80 minutes, but the bad jokes and terrible acting make it seem twice as long. Jason Mewes has always been fine acting in other movies, but here his acting is really dull. The worst actor is Paris Hilton, who plays a rich heiress, known by the public because of her father's fame...sound familiar?The direction is usually okay, but it can get annoying. One instance Paris Hilton kicks Jason Mewes in what looks like the most staged act ever. One scene the camera swirls around 180 degrees, but it seems they couldn't get a full 360 degree turn, so it keeps doing the same 180 degree turn during the same conversation and it's practically nauseating. For the main titles, I'll blame Howie Nourmand, the title supervisor. The opening scene was a poor flash animation, as were several scenes throughout, and it cheapened the movie.Owen (Jason Mewes) hasn't been taking care of his father's bar, and it's going to close down if he doesn't get money to pay the debts off. Owen goes to California to win a bar tending contest, and while there he lives with his closeted homosexual Uncle Earl (David Keith). Uncle Earl works as a camera man for an entertainment program, and while on set, Lisa Mancini (Paris Hilton), a well known wealthy girl, almost hits Owen with her car and ends up ruining a movie set. Because this would be bad publicity for the studio, she doesn't agree to pay Owen or acknowledge what happened. This angers him, so he blackmails her, but instead of the money, he wants her to make him popular. They end up falling in love, but she's dating TV star Hayden Field(Brian Hallisey). Chaos ensues.Spoilers are featured in the next two paragraphs, so don't read on if you want to be surprised by the predictable ending. The characters here are very strange. Owen is extremely unlikeable and I would have liked to see him get nothing, go back home poor and live in a cardboard box, but instead he gets the girl, and gets the money for his dad's bar. Hayden Field is actually a nice character, and wants to help people out. Hayden ends up losing his career, because Owen is a jerk and releases a porno video that Hayden made. Hayden ends up working in a fast food joint, which makes no sense. I didn't realize that right after you lose your acting job you become poor and need work. Looks like the writers didn't think of that...anyways, Hayden ends up with no girlfriend or money, but he still is friends with the jerk who did this to him, and he even suggests for Owen to pursue Lisa. What kind of sense does that make? The writing is based entirely on backwards morals that don't add up.The whole video tape part of the film made no sense. Every part of the film relating to the video tapes were stupid, and full of plot holes, inconsistencies and were really just a cheap way to end the movie. First thing, is why in the world would a big time movie star have a VHS camcorder? If he's so rich, he'd at least have a camera from within the last 5 years, and Hayden said himself that every company gives him everything for free. Apparently cameras weren't one of them. Next, why would the video of Hayden ruin his career, but the even more explicit video from Uncle Earl boost his career higher than it ever was? Also, how in the world would television host Pip Wingo (Phil Morris), who didn't even see what happened to the tapes, figure out exactly how Uncle Earl switched them. Is he psychic? Finally, why does no one actually think to watch the tapes before paying huge sums of money to get them? Are people, other than the very untalented writers of this flick that stupid?Onto the acting. It's about what you'd expect in comparison to everything else about the film, really bad. Jason Mewes and Paris Hilton give similar performances, like both of them were drunk or high while filming, which they very well could have been. David Keith deserves to be a supporting character on a TV sitcom, because this guy is pretty charismatic. His character is annoying, and nothing is funny about his character, but he's trying his hardest, and with a TV show, he wouldn't be half bad.The musical score isn't bad. It's fairly lively and fun. It was almost like a worse version of Danny Elfman's theme to Pee Wee's Big Adventure, but it really wasn't bad. It's one part of the movie that's alright.I don't get why the title of this movie is Bottoms Up. Jason Mewes plays a bartender, but that has nothing to do with the plot, and is rarely seen. It's probably named this to appeal to drunk teens who find relateable titles hilarious. It might as well be called "Take a Hit" or "Knocking Back a Few". They're just as logical titles as "Bottoms Up". It's not about drinking, it's about a poorly acted romance.My final complaint is about the cover. Why does Paris Hilton have blonde hair on the cover but brown hair in the movie? Why is she first credited over Jason Mewes? She really isn't in that much of the movie despite being the main romantic interest. Also, I think Jason Mewes has a more solid fan base than Paris Hilton. It's really easy to nitpick this movie, because of everything about it. Clichés around every corner followed by nonstop gay/fart jokes. Maybe that's funny to some people...no, I can't imagine this being funny to anyone.My rating: BOMB/****. 85 mins. R for language, sexual/crude humor and drug use.
kylebolson
I can honestly say that it was the worst movie I've ever seen in my entire life. Watching Paris Hilton's "acting" was literally painful. The major problems were the bad acting, lack of plot, random flashes to cartoons, no character development, and terrible dialogue. First of all Paris Hilton has absolutely no acting talents whatsoever. It's like the lights are on but no one's home. She's off in space not even paying attention to what's going on. I can't say I really blame Jason Mewes for not doing a phenomenal acting job. Any one forced to act as if they felt a genuine affection towards Paris Hilton would clearly be asked to achieve a feat beyond the talents of anyone on the planet. The movie starts off to be about Jason Mewes trying to win money to save his dad's bar. He enters a bar tending flair competition, loses, and within the first 15 minutes the plot has completely shifted over to be a crappy written love story. This plot line is never mentioned again. For some strange reason there are random flashes where the movie switches over to cartoon. I suppose due to budget issues or whatever. I have to say that the somewhat amusing yet utterly retarded cartoon was Matt Davis throwing himself off a cliff while yelling "I'm a huge jack-ass!" I'm still not very sure as to what that had to do with the "plot", but it's always fun to see Matt Davis look like a douche bag. As for the character development, we're supposed to believe that Paris Hilton is viewed as a rich snotty party girl (as in real life), who actually is nice, kind, helpful towards the poor, and my favorite likes to read books. That's a laugh. Can you imagine Paris Hilton reading anything that doesn't spell C-O-C-K? The truth is there was absolutely no character development towards this idea that Paris Hilton was smart or caring. Think about it she has the personality of a brick, and she can only act as herself, you do the math. As for Jason Mewes character, he nearly gets run over by Paris, loses both his and his uncle's jobs due to her, and he still says "She seems nice." That doesn't add up. His character must possess some sort of ESP because he's able to magically sense the fact that she's a "nice girl" despite nearly getting run over and fired. The dialogue in this movie was dreadful. Some of the worst was that between Matt Davis and Uncle Earl. Their trash talking consisted of "Go back to the valley Quaker oats," and "Let's rock n' roll chumpenstein!" Other good lines were, "I'd rather be at home reading a book." I doubt that Paris Hilton could read a picture book, much less one with actual words. I could go on giving examples of terrible of dialogue, but with the examples I've given anything else would pale in comparison. On top of this the film contained poor cinematography, bad editing, and seemed to lack any real direction. I would definitely give this film one star, but only because zero is not a choice. I don't recommend this movie to ANYone unless perhaps I hated them and wanted to steal 89 minutes from their life.
