ThiefHott Too much of everything

Baseshment I like movies that are aware of what they are selling... without [any] greater aspirations than to make people laugh and that's it.

Zlatica One of the worst ways to make a cult movie is to set out to make a cult movie.

Logan By the time the dramatic fireworks start popping off, each one feels earned.

Sam Panico There was a time that roller derby was one of the most popular sports on UHF TV, vying with pro wrestling for ratings and attendance. And much like its cousins in the squared circle, it had predetermined finishes and storylines. Don't blame me for breaking kayfabe - Unholy Rollers does this right off the bat, explaining how everything has to go according to the game plan and how fights and falls really work!Karen (Claudia Jennings, Truck Stop Women, 'Gator Bait) wants a better life than working in a canning factory, but has no idea how to do so until she discovers the glamourous and oh so dangerous world of roller derby (there was a rival film that followed a similar storyline, Kansas City Bomber starring Racquel Welch).Unlike any other rags to riches story you've ever watched, Karen might be the hero, but she's a horrible person. She uses and abuses everyone in her way. And the fact that she becomes a star by going against the script goes to her head, leading to her never listening to anyone.Along the way, Karen battles her team's star, Mickey Martinez (Betty Anne Rees, Sugar Hill), a tough, muscular lesbian who comes on to her. This leads to the entire team stripping Karen in a bar and her having an affair with the team captain, Nick. That affair starts with her riding on his motorcycle, shooting his gun at LA landmarks and then kicking his ass on the track and then getting ass on said track.And the ending! Karen knows she's on the way out, so she flips out on everyone. Her opponents, her team, the audience, cars in the parking lot and even raises her fist to the police as the credits roll.This is a grimy, tough little movie with plenty of fun to be had. Roberta Collins (Death Race 2000, Eaten Alive) is in it and so is Joe E. Tata (Nat from the Beverly Hills, 90210 Peach Pit). It's directed by Vernon Zimmerman, who also wrote Teen Witch and directed Fade to Black. And its editor? Martin Scorsese!

Scott LeBrun From executive producer Roger Corman comes this energetic ode to the lively and exploitative sport of roller derby, focusing on one team, the L.A. Avengers, and their newest acquisition, a former cannery employee named Karen Walker (70's drive-in picture goddess Claudia Jennings). Karen quickly becomes a fan favourite with her moves and picks up some endorsement deals in the bargain. But not everybody is rooting for Karen. She finds a rival in the bitchy Mickey (Betty Anne Rees, "Sugar Hill"), and her reign as queen of the roller derby circuit is eventually challenged by up and comer Beverly Brayton (Charlene Jones).Jennings makes the most of her vibrant role (and yes, she shows us some of the goods); her performance is exuberant and engaging. The supporting cast is packed with some familiar faces and is likewise entertaining to watch: Candice Roman ("The Big Bird Cage") as Karens' best friend Donna, Alan Vint ("Macon County Line") as Donnas' boyfriend Greg, Roberta Collins ("Death Race 2000") as Karens' teammate Jennifer, Louis Quinn ('77 Sunset Strip') as team owner Mr. Stern, Joe E. Tata ('Beverly Hills, 90210') as Sterns' son-in-law Marshall, Jerry Lewis foil Kathleen Freeman in a cameo as Karens' mother, John Steadman ("The Longest Yard" '74) as a guard, Dan Seymour ("Key Largo") as a used car dealer, Victor Argo ("Bad Lieutenant") as the trainer, Hunter von Leer ("Halloween II" '81) as a thief, and Rick Hurst ('The Dukes of Hazzard') as a mover.Vernon Zimmerman ("Fade to Black" '80) made his fictional feature film directing debut here, working from a screenplay by Howard R. Cohen ("Saturday the 14th"), and gives the viewer an eyeful of the go-for-broke crazy atmosphere of the sport. The action is often breathless, and the pacing very effective. Particularly impressive are the editing (supervised by a young Martin Scorsese) the costumes (by Cornelia McNamara), and the camera-work (by Scott Lloyd-Davies and Arthur R. Botham). Kendall Schmidt ("Neon Maniacs") composed the score. The colourful characters such as Angie Striker (Maxine Gates) and Horace McKay (John Mitchell) add to the fun. The final act is quite rousing as the spectators get into the act, and in the end there is a message about how people can't remain on top of the world forever.Must viewing for any Claudia Jennings fan.Eight out of 10.

Woodyanders The late, great, sorely missed Claudia Jennings, the one and only breath-takingly beauteous blonde goddess of deliciously down'n'dirty 70's drive-in cinema, is in typically perky, savvy, sexy and splendidly resilient form as Karen Walker, a feisty, recalcitrant former factory worker who becomes an especially tough, ruthless, fearsome and hugely popular roller derby star, greatly adored by fans and vehemently despised by her fellow roller derby players (said players include members of her own team!). Alas, Karen's time in the spotlight proves to be fleeting, due equally to her soon out-of-control over-sized ego and the loutish blue collar audience's unreliably fickle taste for flash-in-the-pan heroines.An authentically grubby'n'grungy grind-house slice-of-rowdy-lowlife character study centering on a terrifically trashy sports phenomenon that was immensely faddish in the early 70's, "Unholy Rollers" sure hits the righteously roughhouse dirtball spot, thanks to Claudia's raw charisma, commanding screen presence and undeniable smoking hot pulchritude. Vernon Zimmerman's fast, spiffy direction, working from a funny, nicely eventful and suitably lowbrow script by veteran schlock movie scribe Howard Cohen (who also wrote such choice cheese as "Deathstalker" and "Space Raiders" for Roger Corman), keeps the picture hopping along at a quick, breezy clip, capturing the funky working class milieu in affectionately vivid detail while still delivering satisfyingly ample amounts of sex, nudity, violence (the dynamic roller derby sequences seriously smoke, going all out with dirty body checks, illegal kicks and punches, volatile umpire and manager brawls, and a truly wild'n'raucous anything-goes gut-busting riot ending -- y'know, the whole gnarly nine yards, baby), and raunchy humor. The top-rate B-movie cast includes luscious blonde 70's exploitation flick perennial Roberta Collins as nasty rival Jennifer, the adorable Candice Roman of "The Big Bird Cage" as Claudia's endearingly ditsy stripper best friend Donna, "Macon County Line" 's Alan Vint as Donna's dim-bulb beau Greg, Jerry Lewis film regular Kathleen Freeman as Claudia's gruff, hard-nosed trailer park white-trash mother, and tough guy character actor Vic Argo in a really amusing bit as Vinnie the trainer. Executive produced by Roger Corman, with sharp, fluid editing by Martin Scorsese and a nifty, jazzy, junky score by Bobby Hart, "Unholy Rollers" makes the grade with flying gaudy colors as a simply super serving of wonderfully wacky'n'tacky 70's exploitation sleaze at its most sensationally snappy and exuberant.

Jimbo-96 It's a shame that Claudia Jennings, Playboy playmate of the year, died at age 29 from a traffic accident, and made a series of low budget, forgettable films. Many of these films still appear on TV from time to time, but not Unholy Rollers, her best film. Another shame. Unholy Rollers is about Claudia joining a roller derby troupe and because of her personality and strikingly good looks, never being accepted into the group. The film is low budget all the way. Probably did well at drive-ins and rural markets, but got swamped by Kansas City Bomber released the same year. I never cared for the roller derby, it's quite stupid, but this "inside story" is quite decent. Just don't expect to find it.