Harpies

2007
2.3| 1h29m| en
Details

Jason Avery is an ex-cop now working as a museum security guard. Armed thieves break in intent on stealing a priceless obelisk that's stored within this vault-like stone structure. The scientist behind the theft talks of the obelisk giving him the power to control harpies, demonic winged female monsters of classic mythology. Through a series of contrived events, the obelisk opens a time portal that Jason promptly falls into, crash landing over a thousand years in the past in a land threatened by evil harpies.

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Reviews

Kattiera Nana I think this is a new genre that they're all sort of working their way through it and haven't got all the kinks worked out yet but it's a genre that works for me.
Mjeteconer Just perfect...
Loui Blair It's a feast for the eyes. But what really makes this dramedy work is the acting.
Rosie Searle It's the kind of movie you'll want to see a second time with someone who hasn't seen it yet, to remember what it was like to watch it for the first time.
khartley42 OK, just watched part of it as it is out on satellite tonight - it didn't go to the theatres at all I guess. It's quite ridiculous - done over the top cheesy on purpose - but it's not funny. Stupid script, lame acting and pathetic effects - it had a cheap porn quality to it. I can get that this was all done on purpose - but I don't get why. It wasn't good enough for a laugh. I imagine it was supposed to be a parody of something. Was this a stupid comic book that they are making fun of then? It does advertise as Stan Lee's Harpies. Do not go into this thinking of Spiderman quality in anyway. Massive waste of time - I didn't get through 20 minutes. Let me know if someone watches the whole thing - or if there was a point I was missing. Poor Baldwin. Poor Stan Lee.
iskye88 Sincerely hoping they all had a good time making this awful flick to ensure that at least there was some fun had here...certainly wasn't much fun to be had on the receiving end.Based on a few posts, I was hoping against all odds (Sci-Fi Channel original, Stephen Baldwin starring) that this would be an entertaining diversion, whether it be a tongue-in-cheek endeavor or a somehow otherwise funny or exciting venture; but unfortunately, this was nothing more than a terrible film. Can we fine the actors for this? That would be fun, and I would be content with the results. Better yet however would be to Star-Chamber the producers.This film is embarrassingly terrible and I despise the fact that Stephen Baldwin lives a better life than most of us.
doom-of-our-time If you loved Army of Darkness then without a doubt you will hate the hell out of Harpies. I promise. From start to finish harpies grabs at almost every theme from Army of Darkness except for undead. Now i know what you're saying, how can this be an Evil Dead knock off without, you know, Evil Dead Things. Well its a simple really. There's a brash womanizer that fools with an artifact in present time and falls through time to a some horrible middle age surreal vista that hurts my heart. Aside from the word "Tis" there is no attempt be authentic. Don't get me wrong I love crap but it throws me when they suddenly remember their acting and try poorly to remind me of it. They do think he's the chosen one, cause... um... well why not. Another snag from Amry of darkness is when Adam Baldwin suggests building a Trebuche. THat's probably spelled wrong but such is my disdain for all things French that i don't care. Also, i can't back up with any fact that that word is French. See, he says he seen it once on PBS and he must have paid such close attention that he had them build one, like on the spot. Sweet. Enough ragging on the fact that they didn't really so much have a movie plot as just time on their hands and some spare money. Let's get to the good stuff. Like how this movie called Harpies has relatively little screen time for said Harpies. I know the reason. I do. See when you have no Idea what the hell a Harpie is but you make a movie called Harpies the safest thing you can do is just ask Adam Baldwin to talk his way through a movie and stare at everything like he's stoned. That covers nicely the fact that you just put CGI bat wings on super models. Also, nerds love hot chicks with bat wings. I love hot chicks with bat wings. The noise the Harpies made.... oh...Oh... I'll let my buddy Pin Head Sum up the Harpy noise with a quote from his not crappy movie. "There is a secret song at the center of the world, Joey, and its sound is like razors through flesh"I didn't give this movie a one for several reason. 1, Coolio wasn't in it. 2, It appealed to my simple side, the side that loves girls with bat wings. 3, the notion of Alec Baldwin watching his brother's movie and laughing like a madman made me do the same. Also, the mixing up of a Succubus and a Harpy is pretty sweet. As a side not I also didn't give this movie a ten because Coolie wasn't in it.
Cas Smith I give this a three simply because I am looking forward to seeing just how consistently poor this "Army of Darkness" wanna-be is going to become. Stephen Baldwin (whose acme really was Barney Rubble) plays a wash-out-cop-now-a-museum guard, who is transported back to 9C Moldavia, and battles harpies controlled by a parody of The Bad Guy. All that to thoroughly stilted script and spastic gesticulations. Ah yes, yet another SciFi Original Movie. Oh! While pecking out this Comment, this movie has remained consistent. So at least it has that going for it. Hmm.... now I have to write more to be acceptable. O.....K..... The trebuchet looks like the Stealth Rabbit King Arthur used to attack the French castle under the tutelage of Monty Python. Ah, good. I have now written enough to pass muster. All rather silly really when all that needed be said about this movie is that it really is marvelously poor. Regards all, Cas

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