This isn't the complete disaster of Wild Wild West, but that's only because none of the $250 million was spent to turn Kenneth Branagh into a mechanical spider.
Depp has done the kooky, costumed character shtick so many times, it's no longer surprising to see him bury his index finger into the desert sand, then lick it
Frustrating, lazy and lifeless.
Your expectations of how bad The Lone Ranger is can't trump the reality.
Matt Zoller Seitz
It's as obsessive and overbearing as Steven Spielberg's "1941"-and, I'll bet, as likely to be re-evaluated twenty years from now, and described as "misunderstood."
Somewhere, around the hour-and-a-half mark, The Lone Ranger makes the fateful decision not to end. Worse, the movie keeps not-ending for another full hour.
When it comes to mining boys' adventure stories, defaming pirates may be fair game, but stories about western justice and native Americans? Not so much.
Who, exactly, was this bipolar oater made for?
Director Gore Verbinski has adopted the more-is-better approach he used in the Pirates of the Caribbean series, crowding the movie with so many extraneous characters and subplots that the film becomes an endurance test.