This is what you get, San Francisco, with all your douchey, flashy, dot-com money: You get stomped on by Godzilla.
Godzilla handles everything the military hurls at him: ships, guns, planes, rockets, even a squadron of HALO paratroopers. The only thing that can cut him down to size is being relegated to a supporting role in his very own movie.
The beasts just want to have fun, but the gravest letdown in Edwards's film is that, most of the time, he fends off the chance to have fun himself.
We're here to see the film's leading lizard, who is pretty gorgeously realized by an army of digitizers, even if he seems just a bit-player in his own movie for the first hour or so.
The first truly joyous popcorn action movie of the season.
It's a tad better than the 1998 Godzilla, perhaps, but that's not saying much.
It's a smooth, sleek, technologically awe-inspiring 3-D blockbuster with a top-shelf cast (speaking middle-to-lower-shelf dialogue most of the time, to be sure, but they do it with style).
Godzilla - both the movie and the big guy - is ... something of a lumpy, lumbering great beast of a thing, lurching from city to city, continent to continent, smackdown to smackdown and plot point to plot point ...
Edwards' expertise in the visual effects field manifests itself in the seamlessness of the computer-generated imagery, if not in its extraordinariness.